There is nothing more attractive and inspiring than seeing a strong confident woman. Yet for most women confidence will be a life long struggle. This can be due to personal experiences or low self esteem. I see so many women who have a very unhealthy relationship with food and their bodies, struggling with aging and trying to compete with younger women, becoming obsessed with being skinny. I believe it is very important to follow your natural body shape and be realistic. Some of us are petite, tall, athletic, curvy, naturally skinny. Beauty comes in all different shapes and sizes and as we age HEALTH is the most important thing. Nutrition and fitness are about being healthy, improving your health and well being. Starving to be thin or binge eating is not healthy. Being underweight or overweight pose serious health risks. Life really is what you make it. You can choose to make it a happy place or a miserable one. At 40 I have never felt happier and more confident and I hope that the tips below will inspire you to improve self esteem and confidence so you can reach your full potential and be happy.
Avoid negative people and negative thoughts
It is important to surround yourself with positive happy people that share the same interests as you. Avoid all negative, jealous and draining people who constantly undermine your self esteem. A lot of low self esteem stems from abusive relationships. When someone puts you down the whole time it is a form of control and manipulation. You have to be strong and break free. You need people that make you feel comfortable and good about yourself. You are the most important person and you must never forget this. Do not harbour negative thoughts of low self worth. Instead of repeating to yourself that you are not attractive, you are not good enough and do not deserve to be happy, change your thoughts by repeating that you are beautiful, you are the most important person and you deserve all the happiness in the world. This should be your daily mantra. Write this down on a piece of paper and stick it on your fridge and by your bedside so you are constantly reminded, especially when you are tempted to allow negative thoughts to creep in. Forget about the past and focus on the now. Learn to be more optimistic. The minute a negative thought comes to your mind quickly push it away and replace it by saying how amazing you are. How you see yourself is how others see you so if you are in a negative state you will attract negativity. So stay positive!
Be active, get moving. Staying indoors sitting on the sofa watching tv and comfort eating, feeling sorry for yourself, living in the past is not the solution. That is the recipe for self destruction. Exercise releases endorphins which make you feel good. When you look and feel good you really feel alive and enjoy living! Find the right exercise for you. We are all different. I would actually suggest ballroom dancing. Dancing is a fun way of exercising, boosting self esteem and improving your mood. Yoga is also incredibly good for the mind, body and soul. I would highly recommend it to everyone. Try to exercise first thing in the morning so that it sets you in a good mood for the rest of the day. It is important to remember that fitness is about being healthy not skinny.
Make a list of what you like about yourself and what you have achieved so far
Write down the parts of your face and body that you like. Is it your hair, eyes, lips, nose, legs? Once you have made a list of what you like work on emphasizing those parts. Wear make up and clothes that accentuate your best body part. Look at everything you have achieved in your life and be proud. Again write these down on a piece of paper and stick it on your fridge. Do not look at your faults like failures. List what you are good at and focus on that. Set new goals. You are never too young or too old to make your dreams come true. Only your fears and lack of focus can stop you.
Eat the right foods to enhance mood
Do not underestimate the power of nutrition. You really are what you eat. Exercise and nutrition work hand in hand. You need to nourish your body with the correct nutrients. Having a good diet will improve your mood helping you become more happy. Include foods that contain tryptophan which will improve your mood like: turkey, chicken, wild salmon, pumpkin seeds, walnuts, bananas, almond butter, tahini, avocado, chickpeas, kidney beans. Alcohol is a depressant so drink in moderation. Sugar, refined carbohydrates and caffeine all have a negative impact on mood.
Do not compete with anyone else
So many women spend far too much time reading magazines wishing they looked like the model on the cover. All pictures are retouched, air brushed making waists smaller, thighs thinner. There is no body part that cannot be retouched. In the real world no one is perfect 24/7. We all have bad days. Also most magazines focus on one type of woman only and again that is not realistic because in the real world beauty comes in different shapes and sizes. Concentrate on you. Do not try to compete with women who are half your age. Focus on being active and healthy and reaching your best potential. Take a picture of you looking your absolute best and stick it on the fridge. That is the only picture you should be looking at.
Improve your body language and pamper yourself
First impressions are everything. When you meet someone for the first time you want to come across as confident so you need to improve posture, learn to smile more and when talking to someone, look them straight in the eye. When shaking someone’s had make it a strong handshake. Learn to pamper yourself. Have a relaxing massage, go for a facial making your skin glow. Have a manicure. Do not be afraid of change. Try a new hairstyle, wear something that you would not normally wear. Never forget that you are the most important person!