Hunger isn’t always straightforward. There are times I have eaten very little and not felt hunger pangs, and other days where I seemingly eat enough yet can’t seem to feel satisfied.
It’s true our nutritional needs change over time. We need more calories when younger, and through different phases of our lives. Yet I know I could go a day without eating very much at 25 and feel fine. Now if I do that, I feel lightheaded and desperate for food.
Hormones play a part and there may be times of the month when your appetite increases. If you still menstruate, you may notice that you’re hungrier or experience stronger cravings in the days leading up to your period. Hormonal fluctuations throughout the month can influence appetite and eating patterns, and some research suggests that energy needs may increase slightly during this phase.
As we move through our 40s and 50s, our hormones change and our energy needs change. We can gradually lose muscle mass and become less active, which means we may not need quite as much energy from food as we once did. But here’s the important part: needing slightly less energy doesn’t mean needing less nutrition. Your body still needs protein to maintain muscle, fibre to support digestion, and a wide range of vitamins and minerals to keep you feeling your best.
So, my question is, if you’ve finished a meal and then found yourself standing in front of the cupboard an hour later feeling hungry again, what’s going on?
The short answer is, there is nothing wrong with you. You are not lacking willpower, and you are not “bad with food.” What you may be experiencing is something I see in my clients all the time, and I call it hidden hunger.
What is hidden hunger?
Hidden hunger is the feeling of wanting more, even when you think you’ve eaten enough. It usually comes from one of two places, and more often, from both at once.
The first is physical. You can eat plenty of food and still miss out on what your body actually needs. Meals that are low in protein, fibre and key nutrients tend to leave you full for a short while, but not truly nourished, which can lead to food cravings an hour later.
Likewise, skipping breakfast, eating very lightly at lunch, or going long stretches without proper food can also leave your body asking for more later in the day, usually in the evening.
The second is emotional. Sometimes the hunger is not for food at all. It can be a need for rest, comfort, company, or a pause after a long day of looking after everyone else. Food is simply the easiest thing within reach at that moment.
Why it shows up more after 40
For many women in their 40s and 50s, life is full. Demanding jobs, family, ageing parents, and a body that feels confusing and needs extra support and care.
Yet meals get rushed or skipped, and often the evening becomes the first quiet moment of the day. That is often when you become aware of the hunger, and, if you’ve already eaten, it can feel frustrating.
It’s important to know, this is not a failure of discipline, it is information.
How to respond with kindness
You do not need a strict plan to work with hidden hunger. Start with asking yourself:
Have I eaten enough today? Look at the shape of your day rather than a single meal. If you’ve been busy and running on very little until the evening, your body is simply catching up and asking for the nutrition you missed.
Does my plate feel satisfying? It’s important to add a source of protein and some fibre to your meals, even the ones you already enjoy. Note: you are not taking anything away, only building on what’s there.
Am I eating enough for the season? Changes in season mean changes in hunger. As autumn arrives and the days become shorter and cooler, you might find yourself feeling hungrier than you did during the summer months. This is perfectly natural. Our bodies respond to changes in temperature, daylight and daily routines, and we may find ourselves craving more warming, comforting foods as the weather turns colder.
What else might I need right now? This is an important question because sometimes we reach for food when what we really need is something else. Perhaps you’re tired and need a break, stressed and looking for comfort, bored and in need of stimulation, or feeling a little lonely and craving connection. When life is busy, it can be easy to overlook these needs and turn to food without really thinking about it.
The next time you find yourself reaching for a snack shortly after eating, try pausing for a moment and checking in with yourself. Ask: Am I physically hungry, or could I be looking for something else? Perhaps you need some fresh air, a short walk, a hot drink, a few minutes of quiet, a proper rest or a conversation with someone who makes you feel good.
Of course, sometimes the answer will simply be that you’re hungry, and that’s absolutely fine. You may not have eaten enough at your last meal, or your body may genuinely need more nourishment. There’s no need to talk yourself out of eating or to treat hunger as something to overcome. The aim is to become more aware of what your body and mind are telling you, so you can respond to your needs with curiosity and kindness rather than guilt or judgement.
Giving your body the nutrition it needs
The important thing is to listen to your body and make sure you’re giving it the nutrients it needs. Choose satisfying, nourishing meals that combine protein, healthy fats and fibre to help keep you fuller for longer, alongside plenty of vegetables and other nutrient-rich foods. The aim is to give your body the right fuel for the life you’re living right now.
A final thought
Hunger is not the enemy. It is your body, and sometimes your mind, asking for something it needs. The next time it appears, pause and ask yourself what you need right now. Listening without judgement is where the change begins.
And remember, there’s nothing wrong with wanting something comforting in the evenings. The key is to recognise whether you’re physically hungry and need more nourishment, or whether you’re looking for food to soothe stress, boredom or emotions. Understanding the difference can help you respond to your hunger with greater awareness, rather than simply reaching for another snack.
If you would like support building a calmer, more consistent relationship with food, come and say hello. I would love to help.